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View Full Version : i can hear my neighbor having sex.


rental
04-30-2007, 06:57 AM
i think its the blond bitch in the next building that i saw closing a window earlier. id hit it. i think. i only saw her briefly.

i like being a voyeur at times like this.



http://www.emergentchaos.com/images/06-july/peeping-tom.jpg

anyone have any good voyeuristic stories that do not involve family?

Hayabusa
04-30-2007, 07:10 AM
i used to have a front row seat to our neighbour disciplining her fucking brat retard hyper ass motherfucker of a kid
he was so annoying, she was loud, he was loud, it was ridiculous
straight up jerry springer shit

Harvey Wallbanger
04-30-2007, 07:11 AM
When i lived with my best friend, I used to be able to hear his incredibly hot girlfriend pretty well when they would have sex. Fortunately, I could never hear him, as that would have made the whole thing far less hot and far more awkward.

Theo.Huxtable
04-30-2007, 07:14 AM
my next door neighbor is always dumping his girlfriends and kicking his girlfriends out of his house. i usually peak through the blinds or the peephole as he does this. he has a different girl about every 2 months. the last time i saw him kick a chick out, he had made her pack all of her stuff in about 4 different luggage bags, and then he lifted that shit over his head, and tossed all 4 of her bags down the street. i don't know how he garnered that much strength. then she was running and screaming "help!"

the funny thing was that during this whole time, she was screaming and crying, calling him "white trash," and he was just solemn and didn't utter a word as he tossed these big-ass pieces of luggage down the street.

one day i feel he's going to mess with the wrong chick

HydrogenPeroxide
04-30-2007, 07:17 AM
My building is really old so sound travels really easily. There's these ventilation shafts that a series of bedroom windows open into and they just amplify the smallest sound, so yeah I hear my neighbors having sex all the time.

Once or twice a week there's this one girl who just gets super loud when she masturbates. She has this crazy vibrator that must be powered by a car battery because that thing is LOUD.

I can't complain though, I've gotten a few knocks on the door the next day about 'noise issues'. One time me and this girl got a round of applause from two other apartments that face the shaft. That was good times. She was embarassed and I was trying to high five her.

*edit to add most of the girls are definitely smashable in this building, so its good times all around.

Baron Von Counterculture
04-30-2007, 07:19 AM
I once heard a friends sister (we were all living together at the time) getting nailed pretty good by the sound of it, suprisingly it was only that once (her guy lived with us too the whole time we lived there) and my room was right below hers. Also in a hotel room I once stayed in you could hear the couple in the next room going at it but only if you were in the bathroom... and I've heard my bro nailing random chicks when we lived together....

*42
04-30-2007, 07:22 AM
Pack in my younger days when I lived in what can only really be described as a "punk rock house", we had a fairly large party.

My friend Neil was talking up this hippy chick with arm hair all night, and feeding her beer and talking about the world and feelings and other hippy shit.

Anywho, the ruse succeeded and he finally got her to his room. For the next while, we heard random screams and yelps. Then the noise ceased.

When he came down in the morning I let him know that I heard screaming and he stopped dead in his tracks, looked me dead in the eye and said, "Was it me or her?"...

Harvey Wallbanger
04-30-2007, 07:26 AM
Well, which one was it?

*42
04-30-2007, 07:32 AM
How would I know? I just heard screaming...

Harvey Wallbanger
04-30-2007, 07:34 AM
Just say it was the girl, and everyone's happy.

*42
04-30-2007, 07:36 AM
I think it's funnier knowing that some of them were Neil.

giggity
04-30-2007, 07:42 AM
my next door neighbor is always dumping his girlfriends and kicking his girlfriends out of his house. i usually peak through the blinds or the peephole as he does this. he has a different girl about every 2 months. the last time i saw him kick a chick out, he had made her pack all of her stuff in about 4 different luggage bags, and then he lifted that shit over his head, and tossed all 4 of her bags down the street. i don't know how he garnered that much strength. then she was running and screaming "help!"

the funny thing was that during this whole time, she was screaming and crying, calling him "white trash," and he was just solemn and didn't utter a word as he tossed these big-ass pieces of luggage down the street.

one day i feel he's going to mess with the wrong chick


keep us updated.. hahahahaha.

decibelrebel
04-30-2007, 08:16 AM
i was in my backyard one night and could see my neighbours 15/16 year old daughter going down on one of her girlfriends in her bedroom.








.....they say 15 gets you 20, doesn't apply if you're just watching from a distance right?

groyn shmoyn
04-30-2007, 08:27 AM
blood fart has very disturbing moans... nuff said.

shaolinmasta
04-30-2007, 08:43 AM
decibelrebel that is pretty churrrrch /no pedo

stevefrench
04-30-2007, 09:00 AM
i used to live in some complex thing, and my neighbors would always have sex with the window open but the blinds closed

this was all set up in a way that it echoed and you could hear every clapping sound if you stood outside on the street between the rows of houses

made smoke breaks pretty interesting

AnUpsetStomach
04-30-2007, 09:00 AM
One time i saw this mom who lived next door doing the dishes in her bra. So hot.

stunt double
04-30-2007, 09:54 AM
i remember being out writing on things i didnt own one night, looking down from a train bridge and being able to see a couple going for it in the back seat of a commodore, it was fucking hilarious.

2006-1984
04-30-2007, 11:56 AM
Watching people is kinda creepy. Not feeling it

R@ndomH3ro
04-30-2007, 12:04 PM
When I lived in Germany, we used to open the windows in the summer to get fresh air.

You could hear the neighbors having sex all the time....funniest moment is they where going at it pretty hard, bitch was screaming her head off....then she started screaming real loud "Ouch!! IT HURTS!! It was a real awkward moment when I saw her in the morning walking my dog, and she was limping around.

Some1
04-30-2007, 12:14 PM
^^^anal


I have heard my roomate having sex (she is a hot chick). Its like mickey mouse club sex. The only way I can describe it is it sound cute? (like a puppy kind of wimpering).

Mauler5150
04-30-2007, 12:18 PM
Once or twice a week there's this one girl who just gets super loud when she masturbates. She has this crazy vibrator that must be powered by a car battery because that thing is LOUD. It wasn't a sybian was it?
http://www.howardstern.com/dtcms/img/RS_04-07-06_Carmen_Sybian_DSC_0112.jpg
http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g210/hollygirard/07-Sybian-orgasm-fact.jpg
I have a few funny stories, I don't know if I should post them as they involve me.....

Some1
04-30-2007, 12:22 PM
dude you invest in one of those. You make your money backing like a week if you employ one chick and make a website... I swear porn is the only way to get new money...

tango 24
04-30-2007, 01:05 PM
oh man...
i saw my neighbour going at it one time
drunk as absolute fuck
trying to have sex in a hammock
shit was fucking hilarious
its hard enough to sit/lie in one of those things
but can you imagine sex
just takes it to a whole nother level of radicalness

Some1
04-30-2007, 01:19 PM
Oh yea outside a bar. There is a private room in one of the bars in hartford with a couch and a view of the street. It has a door for privacy. Well you can see inside the room from the street. Me and my friends pull in to the parking lot across the street from this bar. I look in the window see these two making out. I told my friend wouldnt it be great if that hot bitch just started bangin right there...What happens we get out the car the dress comes off then (because the back of the couch is to the window) you see the girls head bobbing up and down over the top of the couch riding the dude semi visible from the street. Shit was dope...

Mauler5150
04-30-2007, 01:20 PM
Yeah, if I had the $2K or whatever they cost I would buy one, and just invite random girls around to sit on it.
And there isn't any money to be made in porn, there is too much of it around that people can access for free. Unless you have already made your money, or can come up with the next big pron craze, you won't really make money.
I was searching for more machines, when I stumbled across this guy.
http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q29/viscioni/faschoarsch.jpg
WTF?

Some1
04-30-2007, 01:26 PM
Porn is a labor of love...

Blood Feast Island Man
04-30-2007, 01:50 PM
there's more money in porn than in hollywood.
my neighbours play cumbia music very, very loudly every weekend.

Cart_Monkey
04-30-2007, 02:23 PM
I live in an really big Arabic neighborhood...my neighbors used to dress really conservatively...the covered head to toe thing...seemed like your typical Muslim couple, quiet respectful types...

But they were loud as shit when they had sex.

...I also hear them pray in the morning and at night...

they take both pretty seriously.

Ethreadzny2
04-30-2007, 02:35 PM
dude you invest in one of those. You make your money backing like a week if you employ one chick and make a website... I swear porn is the only way to get new money...

dude, you want to start a business.

Some1
04-30-2007, 02:57 PM
Done... Tri-stateBooty.com

skullnbones
04-30-2007, 03:06 PM
I had to start wearing earplugs again. I live next door to some next level dyke household and believe me some fucked up shit goes on over there.

Some1
04-30-2007, 03:13 PM
Ask for an invite. Tell'em they need someone who can hold a camera...


I got a jamaican dude who lives under me played reggaeton till 12am last night... I am buying car sub woofers and a car battery gonna play some of those basstest drag racing cd's and I am gonna just put the things to the floor shake the whole house if I get pissed....


co-signed
vvv

rental
04-30-2007, 04:08 PM
dude, i know i made this thread, but this is one of the best threads ive ever read (ie, excludes certain picture threads). it has a great participation level.

rushawn wuan
04-30-2007, 04:27 PM
years back at my old house it seemed like every weekend my neighboor would beat the shit out of his crackhead girlfriend in the middle of the night.

the guy would scream at the top of his lungs all kinds of shit to her. in the morning i would say wassup to him and maybe go ride bikes with his son.

lepthebeard
04-30-2007, 05:23 PM
...I'm kind of upset I moved, my ex-neighbour was loud and hot...
...she was a stripper to boot and well you know the rest of the story........

R@ndomH3ro
04-30-2007, 05:25 PM
Did she walk around topless?

I knew a stripper chick once...she used to walk around nude all the time, it was hard to carry a conversation with her.

MoeBumps
04-30-2007, 05:29 PM
out bombing, we'd spot lots of people having sex. one of my homies would
take to climbing a tree close to the window for up close and personal
spyballism. i'd just laugh. what a freak.

Some1
04-30-2007, 05:30 PM
If you have a stripper as a neighbor it is your duty to befriend her so she can come to your place have a couple drinks put on a show for you which will end in sex. Or when you have parties she brings her stripper friends... (you will be getting laid either way)

castro
04-30-2007, 05:39 PM
My friend heard his mum being fucked once, when he was 14. Pretty messy.

R@ndomH3ro
04-30-2007, 05:41 PM
My friend heard his mum being fucked once, when he was 14. Pretty messy.

And now look at him

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/e1/199982.3.png

Mauler5150
04-30-2007, 05:41 PM
Hahah at the last few posts.
And yes, great participation here.

rental
04-30-2007, 05:42 PM
castro:

okay. gross. dont ruin the thread, ese. it says "no family!" i hate you.

castro
04-30-2007, 05:43 PM
oh. and watched a couple having sex in a tiny, tiny car outside my friends house after coming back from bombing once. Windows were steamed up but you could see some wild shit going down in that back seat.

castro
04-30-2007, 05:44 PM
castro:

okay. gross. dont ruin the thread, ese. it says "no family!" i hate you.

fuck you, just boosted the grossness of this thread at least 7 points!

correct
04-30-2007, 05:59 PM
my downstairs neighbor and her ex would fuck like crazy and then he would beat the shit out of her. it was always loud.

there are some gnarly dents in the floor of the bedroom of my old apartment.

BruceLeroy
04-30-2007, 06:27 PM
the couple above me arent loud its the bed thats loud.

*42
04-30-2007, 06:39 PM
Sometimes I fear we are the neighbor who people tell stories about.

fuse=--action
04-30-2007, 07:35 PM
I used to have this girlfriend that was loud as hell when we would fuck. Sometimes she screamed so loud it made my ears hurt.

That being said, we were going at it pretty late one night/early one morning, and I'm hittin' from behind and she looks back and freaks out on me. Turns out someone was at the window watching. I don't know because I never saw him/her, but I'm pretty sure that it was the neighbor making sure that no one was getting murdered from the way she screams.

Long story short, she ran outside with a knife. I laughed.
-fuse.

Besides, she's a stripper now, so what the fuck should it have mattered to her?

Some1
04-30-2007, 07:42 PM
HAHAHA^^^


I got caught by a cop fucking once that shit was scary. I got caught fuckin my girl in my friends car by 5 of my friends. You could hear them outside like "Who the fuck is going at it in Jims car?! Who is that they were trying to see inside. Me and my girl were so drunk just continued laughing since you couldnt see through the steam on the winders...Until my friend came back to his car with the keys. Then it just got more funny...er?

Bruce_1nR
04-30-2007, 07:49 PM
BWhahahaahaha, hmm, I dont have any neighbors who are loud like that, but sometimes they leave the light on and I can see the shadows in the shades....

CALIgula
04-30-2007, 07:53 PM
as far as voyeurism goes.....

when i was staying in venezuela the apartment i was in overlooked the next building over..
i was just staring out at the city one day and saw a pretty good looking, fit MILF vaccuming in a bra and thong....so the next morning i looked out the window and saw the MILFs neighbor...a really really really fucking hot early 20's venezuelian chick standing on her balcony wearing a flismy blouse and black boy shorts....she had a nice ass..

as far as ear hustling goes...

we were kicking it at a motel 6...in front of our room...when an older guy and a cute young blonde chick checked in to the room next to us....as they were taking in their luggage..the girl kinda just looked at us and smiled.....about 15 minutes later all we hear is the squeeking of the matress and her moans.....lasted for about half an hour...

another time i was at my boys apartment complex....we walked by someones apartment and they had the window open and we heard some girl getting into the sex...

as for me.......i was fucking this girl i was seeing...and she was really loud....since she lived in an older apartment complex...i told her that her neighbors might hear....and she said that was the point...she wanted them to hear....so i just fucked her harder and got her to moan louder to put on a show for the neighbors.

another time...i was fucking this chick and we were both being kinda loud....when we were done i noticed that even though her blinds were closed, her window was wide open....she felt embarassed, but i was lovin it!...after all....i didnt have to live there.

Qawee
04-30-2007, 07:55 PM
yo caligula
where in venezuela did you stay? hilton in downtown caracas?

edit: nm just realize you said apartment

CALIgula
04-30-2007, 07:56 PM
^^the first time i went i stayed at the hotel ccc in caracas....
but this last time i went i stayed with family in the los palos grandes area of caracas.

Qawee
04-30-2007, 08:01 PM
i was only in venezuela for 10 days, but caracas seemed at the time like the coolest place on the planet.
1 dollar for a beer at the bar, 1.50 for cigarettes
$3 for a big ass hamburgesa con huevos sin hamon
CHEA.

HOOKS&...
04-30-2007, 08:19 PM
sometimes i leave my windows and doors oen and fuck my dogs ass really hard and he yells like you broke his foot the neibors called animal control and they came to my house...
fuk.. shit was ugly ... shit all over the floor from the dog trying to get away from me finally i got him into the closet and shut the door and thats when animal control just walked into my house because my dogs was yelling so damn loud./. they walked through my house and they oened the closet door.............. and you dont want to know the rest ... most likley

Some1
04-30-2007, 08:25 PM
I like this kid he's got spunk

fat ralphy
04-30-2007, 08:28 PM
im usually the one having sex that other people hear...

delonemonkey
04-30-2007, 08:37 PM
I was smoking with my friend in his studio and we had the door to the backyard open and there was a couple in the next building fucking, and they were loud as hell.. there was even a dog barking from the same window. So we yelled some stupid shit at them with a megaphone and embarresed them

Some1
04-30-2007, 08:47 PM
See thats messed up. I never interupt people fucking like last time I heard it I cant believe i didnt remember this before.

2 weeks ago I go to a party show up wicked late(because cool people never show up on time). Everyone is already drunk there is this big(not fat just tall amazonia style girl) loud all over my friend kev. Kev is a skinny dude. So the night goes on me and my boy Cipo are not as faded as the rest of the crowd we are sitting back watching these kids be retarded. My friend Kev goes up stairs. The girl who owns the house was like theyare fucking in my roomates bed WTF?! So we hear loud as fuck in a deep voice UH UH OH MY GOD YOU ARE FUCKING ME YOU ARE SO FUCKING ME. UH UH UH. I go to my boy Cipo I think that girl is killing kev right now. We go up the stairs it was the girl. Hardcore faking this shit she had to be it was such an odd sound when it comes sex wise. So my boy Cipo who is a musician whips out his MP3 player and starts recording it "I wanna listen to this further to get a chicks opinion on if it was fake. We didnt think it was gonna work since I mean Mp3 recorded quality is so bad. SHIT WAS CRYSTAL CLEAR!!! So we take it hook it up to my car and show the girls roomate. She said she sounds wicked weird when she fucks...

I just emailed my boy and am gonna see if he will send me the MP3 I will upload it on here if he does...

This is the girl def. a smash or trash canidate

http://a490.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/00929/98/46/929176489_l.jpg

^^SNEAK LOOK ORBZ!!!

CALIgula
04-30-2007, 09:09 PM
i was only in venezuela for 10 days, but caracas seemed at the time like the coolest place on the planet.
1 dollar for a beer at the bar, 1.50 for cigarettes
$3 for a big ass hamburgesa con huevos sin hamon
CHEA.


yeah....its a pretty fun city.....with cute girls everywhere....theres this plaza called el centro commercial san ignacio...at night its a strip full of bars restaurants and hot women....

and when i went to isla margarita.....i tried the hamburgesa con huevos....but i had it with ham.....it was different but it was still pretty good.

castro
04-30-2007, 09:17 PM
smash. although strange fucking posture.

lessthanzero.
04-30-2007, 09:35 PM
during my sophomore year of college i was dating a girl who still lived in the dorms, and i'd always be over there cos my place was a shithole. anyways, basically every night i was there we would hear the sound of bedsprings and moaning coming from above. after about 3 months of this we figured out it was this really nerdy, ogre-looking chick who would constantly play ddr and dress up like harry potter (seriously), and her morbidly obese boyfriend.

also once when i was like 13, after my friend had unsuccessfully tried to hit some kid with a sock full of quarters because his mom answered the door (another story for another day), we were walking back home, disappointed, when all the sudden we see this guy just getting domed in his car, parked on a pretty busy street.

nothing too great.

goodtimes105
04-30-2007, 10:42 PM
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g195/adelossa/random/canadian_porno.jpg

YALL
04-30-2007, 11:04 PM
man i got stories for days...

when i was around 14 or so, me and some buddies were playing football, and running through yards in the neighborhood and shit (front yards) and we all like gang tackled this one kid in this one front yard, dog pile style, get up from that, look in this big bay window, and see this guy and his wifey boning right there on the couch... funniest shit ever. me and like 9 buddies just sitting there like what tha fuck are they doing right there in plain view...

and ive witnessed many people having sex, at parties, 3 some and 4 somes i was almost in, etc etc

YALL
04-30-2007, 11:07 PM
i might smash amazon broad if i was fucking on it. otherwise, no.

MoeBumps
04-30-2007, 11:39 PM
Some1 uses the word 'wicked' WAY out of context.

ex:'wicked weird'

alright story though.

roadpig
04-30-2007, 11:51 PM
i stumbled on some people sexxin in the backseat of their car. i was hittin up on a truck, and a car was coming. i duck inbetween the truck and the parked car. i heard some female moaning and peek into the car and dude's head pops up...i started laughing and took off running...dude chased me, took a swing and hit me in the back of my head...but i kept running and laughing. i got away though. i remember him yelling at me, "what did you see, what did you seeeeee!!!???" ahahaha..

APDFanClub
04-30-2007, 11:53 PM
i once saw my neighbor slap his wife out in his backyard, and then he pulled a knife on the bitch, then threatened to kill her if she didn't go down on him, so she did, and after he killed her anyways, he first cut off one of her fingers and then she tried to run, but then he just grabbed her and slit her throat. I thought it was over there, but no. He then fucked her while she was dying, and again when she had died. Now mind you, im not a sick fuck that just watches this guy do this and not call the police or tries to help, trust me, i thought about it. But i decided against it because i was really-really comfortable where i was, and the phone was inside, and besides i might have been hurt by that guy. So then after he fucked her dead body, he dragged her into the forest behind our houses, with a shovel, oh yeah and he dragged her down there by her hair. Pretty cool.

BreastRockets
04-30-2007, 11:56 PM
Late at night i walked up to one of these things http://www.airwaveaust.com.au/i/contai16.jpg and around the corner i ran into a white girl letting a black dude smash from behind. there were like 4 feet away from me and the only thing i could do was laugh. She got up really quick and was pretty embarrassed and i just proceeded to what i was doing. 20 minutes later on my way back i found the couple again in the back of there car in a parking lot.

delonemonkey
05-01-2007, 12:00 AM
i once saw my neighbor slap his wife out in his backyard, and then he pulled a knife on the bitch, then threatened to kill her if she didn't go down on him, so she did, and after he killed her anyways, he first cut off one of her fingers and then she tried to run, but then he just grabbed her and slit her throat. I thought it was over there, but no. He then fucked her while she was dying, and again when she had died. Now mind you, im not a sick fuck that just watches this guy do this and not call the police or tries to help, trust me, i thought about it. But i decided against it because i was really-really comfortable where i was, and the phone was inside, and besides i might have been hurt by that guy. So then after he fucked her dead body, he dragged her into the forest behind our houses, with a shovel, oh yeah and he dragged her down there by her hair. Pretty cool.

sounds hot, pics?

IOU
05-01-2007, 01:35 AM
Just this weekend I heard a friend smashing it out with this chick.. Now there was a few of us in the next room when we hear the girl moaning.. Later we all sat around drinking and making fun of her.. She was good sport though..

As for me.. I had this loud girl at my house.. Windows open.. I had the front apartment and can see who's coming in to the building.. So we're going at it and she's doing her best opera tribute when I see those Christian/Catholic women who go 'round building to building leaving those pamphlets.. Standing outside.. With a half grin on their face.. Needless to say I hit that ass even harder... Can't remember last time I had such a big smile on my face..

APDFanClub
05-01-2007, 02:41 AM
http://solastyear.com/backontopic.jpg

rental
05-01-2007, 03:28 AM
whats not on topic?

rushawn wuan
05-01-2007, 04:05 AM
i was walkinghome late night long time ago and right next door to my house theres this camaro.
As im walking passed it i think to myself "whos maro is this? ive never seen it here before"
The driver seat is empty and the couple is on the passenger seat. the girl is on the bottom and the guy is on top KILLING her shit however i couldnt hear shit because the windows were closed.

i glanced as i passed by and went inside my house.

rental
05-01-2007, 05:45 AM
oh, that reminds me. i was walking to a friends house after school or something, and as im on the sidewalk going past a house, i hear this dude yelling like crazy and beating the shit out of someone. their wife or their daughter. i thought about calling the cops cause shit sounded really serious, but i didnt know what to do. it seemed unreal to me. but it was so loud, i could hear that shit clear from where i was. the sidewalk was like 20-30 ft from the house.

Anal Eyez
05-01-2007, 10:30 AM
Once on the strip in vegas me and my friends saw a guy jerkin off in his hotel room to some porn.....it was pretty funny

seven.13
05-01-2007, 11:23 AM
I've seen people having the sex outside several times for some reason.."Oh..hi..uh..bye'.

I think my neighbors to the left are having sex..they are giggling and making strange noises. Lucky bastards.

AyeBee
05-01-2007, 02:47 PM
One time we were all kickin it at my boy's crib, he takes his girl into the next room and starts fuckin her and they were LOUDDD. As a bonus, she had the ill dirty talk goin on

blood fart
05-01-2007, 10:16 PM
We were drinking on a roof at some guy's house once.
With a clear view into the room of a teenage boy in the house behind us.
We saw him internet porning.
And masturbating.
So we yelled at him.
He shut his blinds.

My nieghbors probably hear me yelling.
Not in a sexy way.
In a "please don't beat me, that really hurts" way.
Even though it is nothing serious.
It lets me know that if I were actually getting abused, they wouldn't do a thing.

fuse=--action
05-01-2007, 11:10 PM
My nieghbors probably hear me yelling.
Not in a sexy way.
In a "please don't beat me, that really hurts" way.
Even though it is nothing serious.
It lets me know that if I were actually getting abused, they wouldn't do a thing.
For the most part, people are uncaring bastards.

Myself included.
-fuse.

MAR
05-02-2007, 01:32 AM
Ha true. I dropped off a flash drive today at the metro lost and found.
/sorta cares.

One holloween i was walking in my city and took a short cut through this alley. This dude ran in behind me and was like "yaw dawg you cant be back here." I was kinda confused and asked him "why?" he looked at me like I was from another planet even though he was definatly not local and said, "my mans back there trying to get right."

Now let me explain this alley, grimey doesnt even begin to cover how nasty that little back road is. It is the back to a few resturants including the shadiest mexican place, a chinese joint, and a ethiopian resturaunt. Now all that grease and rotten food is all over the driveway and i dont think its ever been washed. The road is black and its made out of concrete. So eventhough I didnt see the dude and chick (which I assume is this snaggle toothed methhead who whores around there, she propositioned me once, I nearly puked.) frankly I didnt want too.

But said dude also had friends in addition to the guy who warned me and three of them decided to chase me. I hid out in my old work. Im not going to lie i was a bit shook.

CALIgula
05-02-2007, 03:08 AM
But said dude also had friends in addition to the guy who warned me and three of them decided to chase me. I hid out in my old work. Im not going to lie i was a bit shook.

how come you didnt turn into super jew???

http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d197/mindscape2469/1671409_l.jpg

MAR
05-02-2007, 03:46 AM
They had pork.

CALIgula
05-02-2007, 03:48 AM
hahaha.

rental
05-08-2007, 12:43 PM
neighbor #2 going at it last night. i think i heard the girl of our new neighbors that just moved in orgasming. its been warm, so they had all the windows and sliding glass door wide open

BIGMETALCIRCUS
05-08-2007, 02:12 PM
my ugly ass cousin and her just as scary looking husband were apparently going at it pretty good this one time. she lived on the first floor of a 3 family house, and left the window open. story I heard, and that she likes to brag about, which is gross (because I'm puking a little in my mouth just thinking about it)... is that the police were called because the neighbors thought she was being attacked she was screaming so loud.

rental
05-08-2007, 02:24 PM
ew.

Milk Grenades
05-08-2007, 04:12 PM
im usually the one having sex that other people hear...

ditto

*42
05-08-2007, 04:13 PM
Fat Ralphy must be a loud dude.

Mauler5150
05-08-2007, 04:26 PM
I can just imagine fat ralphy screaming at his woman to take a shit while he fists her. From what he has said in posts I am pretty sure he is into both these things.

viperface
05-08-2007, 04:26 PM
My upstairs neighbors sound like this:
The first 5 minutes, one can only hear the bed banging against the wall, then about 30 seconds there's high pitched female voice going "aahh, ahh" and then it stops.

I think I'm using their internets. hope they can't read this.

NerdUnit
05-08-2007, 04:33 PM
5 and a half minutes = short changed

rental
05-09-2007, 02:56 AM
serious

MAR
05-09-2007, 03:03 AM
neighbor #2 going at it last night. i think i heard the girl of our new neighbors that just moved in orgasming. its been warm, so they had all the windows and sliding glass door wide open

next time waltz right in and be like...

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/118/299002984_7ae85a5b18.jpg?v=0

$tay bay wit it
05-09-2007, 03:05 AM
sex must be 10 times better for chicks tahn dudes yadadamean?

Car Talk
05-09-2007, 03:23 AM
me and my girlfriend used to live above a cop who clearly disliked us from the get go. but one day we were in the middle of "it" when theres banging on the door followed by "police open up!". Turns out he thought I was beating her (shes a hell of a screamer) so he made her come out and tell him that we were just fucking. She was all red in the face but then he just said "carry on", smiled and walked away. We had some awkward moments in the hall after that.

Drunkfux
05-09-2007, 03:35 AM
On holiday in spain stayin in some apartments, came home drunk as hell, decided to sit on the balcony and have a smoke, cud hear some panting so i looked over and saw a couple having sex on the balcony directionally below, watched them for a min, think they heard me cause they went inside

CountHaysForDays
05-09-2007, 04:17 AM
A friend and I went back to this dudes house after painting, it was a town house, one right next to the other kinda deal, and as we walked down the driveway, you could literally see through the venitian blinds this sweedish (hot) girl and this dude havign sex, the light was on, and you could make shit out super clear. We don't have thick windows here, so you could hear it all too. We stood right below and watched for literally 15 minutes. It was one of the most entertaining experiences of my life, it was about 5 years ago, and the fact we used to see the neighbours and say hi and what not made it ten times better.

"inkie"
05-09-2007, 04:27 AM
A teacher from my old middle school just got arrested for molestation...good thing I didnt have her as a teacher

HydrogenPeroxide
05-09-2007, 04:39 AM
^^ how the fuck does that have anything to do with neighbors having sex?

MY ROTTING LIVER
05-09-2007, 04:44 AM
When I was younger I was having sex with my girlfriend in my car while parked at some random school we had stopped at. We were just leaving when cops showed up, apparently called by the neighbors. I told the cop I got lost - mind you in a parking lot with only one exit - he looked at my girlfriend all disheveled, smiled, and said goodnight.

rental
05-09-2007, 05:24 AM
thats a kind of cute and teenager-y story.

CALIgula
05-09-2007, 05:27 AM
i got caught by the cops before..... me and this girl were about to have sex in the car...

we were both pretty much undressed when the cop car hit the corner...he ran both of our names....she had unpaid tickets....he told her to clear them up...then told us if we wanted to do it.....drive south about 6 more miles....to the next county so it wouldnt be his problem.

louise2wease
05-09-2007, 05:28 AM
ha, sounds like that cop knows how bogus that bullshit law is...

CALIgula
05-09-2007, 05:29 AM
pretty much....he coulda been an asshole....but wasnt....one of the only few times i havent gotten fucked with by the police.

HydrogenPeroxide
05-09-2007, 05:34 AM
so naked girls are the answer to getting out of tickets?



... makes sense

louise2wease
05-09-2007, 05:35 AM
hooray for nakedness! i love being naked.

edit:: irrelevant, but idc.

rushawn wuan
05-09-2007, 05:39 AM
pics?

CALIgula
05-09-2007, 05:44 AM
^hahaha....actually yes...i got them somewhere on my hardrive.

rushawn wuan
05-09-2007, 05:44 AM
hook em up nigga

louise2wease
05-09-2007, 05:45 AM
uhhh... not of me naked. no.

Dirty_habiT
05-09-2007, 05:51 AM
5 and a half minutes = short changed

Sex doesn't necessarily have to take a long time every time... if both partners cum then 2 minutes wouldn't even matter.

CALIgula
05-09-2007, 05:52 AM
hook em up nigga


lemme go look for them.

rushawn wuan
05-09-2007, 06:03 AM
fo sho

rental
05-09-2007, 06:16 AM
Sex doesn't necessarily have to take a long time every time... if both partners cum then 2 minutes wouldn't even matter.

uhhhh, no.

Parklife
05-09-2007, 07:59 AM
Sex doesn't necessarily have to take a long time every time... if both partners cum then 2 minutes wouldn't even matter.


Spoken like a true minute man.

MY ROTTING LIVER
05-09-2007, 08:23 AM
He said 2 minutes...