Ever bust a meeeeeeeean nut in you girls grill?

[MeroSeis]

[img]http://www.12ozprophet.com/ubb//cool.gif'>

KILLA MERO
SPLASHIN OFF

[boogie hands]

ahahahaahha.....hells yeah.....she usually swallows but sometimes ill whip it out and play porno on her face....shits soooooo funny. it always manages to get us both rolling......first time i got head i shot it in the chicks nose......that was the funniest shit ive ever seen......

------------------
brick, brick ,brick...thats how i be up against your girlfriends ass...

[shameless self promotion]

ha ha...north carolina fuckers are pretty goofy...

[brown twinkie]

never understood the appeal of nuttin' on a girls face.
my girl sure doesn't want it, and it doesn't do shit for me.
boobicles are another thing.

[the common cold]

Originally posted by shameless self promotion:
ha ha...north carolina fuckers are pretty goofy...

not at all.

[imported_fatguydist]

boobs or belly..... all im sayin

[fr8lover]

its all about shootin' the babies on the belly...

[imported_Seym1has2no3fiends]

Shit, I'm about to get real personal- She hates that on her face, I know. If it gets in her hair especially she'll like freak out hardcore. BUT belly and breats are completely ok for her, so that's good. Kinda odd too, I guess I'm lucky. BUT one time when I was getting head I neglected to tell her that I was about to bizust and she has moving away for just a second and then... well, you know the rest. She wasn't mad, but she wasn't happy.

[I_Lock_Kids_In_My_SELER]

damn you guys are lucky

[keep]

that same kinda thing happened to me only it went strait into her eye, she started screaming and ran to the bathroom, i laughed so fucking hard, she was pissed.

[boogie hands]

Originally posted by shameless self promotion:
ha ha...north carolina fuckers are pretty goofy...

...actually i am goofy, ill give you that but im not FROM north carolina....please dont do me like that....im just passing throught temporarlly....


------------------
brick, brick ,brick...thats how i be up against your girlfriends ass...

[Face Me Face Death]

bout a year ago this girl I was dating was giving me a BJ...I hadn't kerked it or anything in about a month because I was just saving my shit up for my next victim...well anyways the girl wears these "emo glasses" (those little blck plastic rimmed glasses...she bibbity bobbin it and then I just say "oh shit"...the second my cock coms out of her mouth this un godly large wad of cum just shoots her right on the bridge of her glasses and just spreds out over the entire things...it was hilarious. it was all dripping off and shit. and that best part was she wasn't even pissed off about it. she got this wierd grin on her face and said she was going to go wash off.

everytime I see her I can't help but chuckle about that.




------------------
Easy E got AIDS from Freddie Mercury

[Face Me Face Death]

Originally posted by keep:
that same kinda thing happened to me only it went strait into her eye, she started screaming and ran to the bathroom, i laughed so fucking hard, she was pissed.


see I got my girls trained to wear eye protection...and on a side note tonight I got a BJ from a catholic school girl...damn it feels good to be a gangsta



------------------
Easy E got AIDS from Freddie Mercury

[maskoner]

all ass... all the time.

[imported_SCOTCH WHISKEO]

Giving facials is regular, everyday shit.You wanna make it interesting try seeing how long you can get her to chill with it (hold her down if you have to, just make believe you are "cuddling"). See if you can keep her from washing or even wiping her face until your seed hardens, completely sealing the eyelids shut. This is especially lovely on darker women or those who really work on their tans, because you get good contrast when the nut turns dry and flakey.

[T.W.F UNABOMBER]

last time i got head the girl said not to come in her mouth. like i give a fuck what she wants so i came in her mouth and she tilted her head back wiped her bottom lip and said "no more". it kind of sounded like she was guzzling a little bit of water.

[Secret]

You guys are mean. SCOTCH WHISKEO is the meanest.

[imported_InPhillyWeSayJawn]

i was gettin head from this girl and i busted in her mouth and all the sudden she bucked up, grabbed her nose and was like "i think its going to come out of my nose!" i don't think actually did, but that shit was maaaaaaad funny.

[T.W.F UNABOMBER]

i forgot to add i was listining to nore while that all happened.
i had to try to bust as quike as i could cause i knew she didnt really want to do it just to impress me, and she could suck dick if her life depended on it.

[deznatori]

adding to the interesting fun. It is always funny to find the passed out drunk girl on the side of the party and give her the facial. They don't wake up right away and when they wake up that shit will be crusty. I'll have to say this beats any: Making someone wet themselves, the old shaving cream or toothpaste trick, and drawing on someone. It hangs right in there with the sticking your thumb in someones mouth when there asleep so when they wake up and see that your cock is hanging out and your just smiling and nodding... well you get the picture on that.

[imported_suburbian bum]

One time i busted in my own eye, no joke. And i wasnt leanin down or tryn to never had it happen more than once tho.

[imported_Clay-Burner]

Originally posted by boogie hands:
first time i got head i shot it in the chicks nose......that was the funniest shit ive ever seen......



Holy shit....Worst mishap ever!

[Face Me Face Death]

Originally posted by InPhillyWeSayJawn:
i was gettin head from this girl and i busted in her mouth and all the sudden she bucked up, grabbed her nose and was like "i think its going to come out of my nose!" i don't think actually did, but that shit was maaaaaaad funny.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

[imported_SCOTCH WHISKEO]

Dear SECRET, forgive the mean spiritedness of my previous post in this thread, however, the topic IS "meeeeeeeeeeean nut". If you wish to start a "nice, sensitive nut" post, I will gladly share tales of my kinder, gentler skeet shooting.

[I_Lock_Kids_In_My_SELER]

I wonder how many of these people are lying.

[imported_Seym1has2no3fiends]

it takes a lot to make seym laugh. this topic made me laugh. "nice, sensative nut" and "no more" are the funniest things since "all your base are belong to us"

[WebsterUno]

hahahahahaha…
I hit a bullseye once.
Shit had me rollin.
I tried to stop laughing,
but she looked at me like this…:dazed:

then did one of these…:lick:

…hahahahahahahaha

[MeroSeis]

whoa my nigga big webs...D.I.T.C
This shit is type old, ahh the old days
I'm gonna go listen to Reasonable Doubt and spark up
holla my niggaz.



MERODOGS
STILL SPLASHIN
HAR MOBB MLBTK

[avils]

Hmmm my girl's not really down for facials or swallowing but occasionally I get lucky..

One time we were on holidays and both maad drunk. Well we were having sex in our hotel roo, and I was like "nah this aint workin" so I climb onto her with knees on either side of her shoulders and stuck my thang straight in her mouth.. then I grabbed the bed posts and just started humpin her mouth. Shit.. I came in about 2 minutes and girl swallowed every last bit with out complaining once.. that was ill.

This other time, she was watching some movie and I just whipped out my man mallet and stuck it to her mouth.. she started sucking the head while I jerked the rest of myself.. anyways I was supposed to tell her when I was gonna nut... (hahah NO WAY) so I gave a little sigh and BLAM *(@# KA POW SPLAT !! Gave it all to her. It caught her by mad suprise and she kinda fell backwards whilst spitting all this splooge over me... dang ! Chalk one up for the girls...

Oh yeah, one other time I busted in her mouth she got up ran to the bathroom and spat it all out.. what's up with THAT ??

out.:rolleyes:

[imported_drain bamage]

boys are dumb:D

[MR BOJANGLES]

Originally posted by SCOTCH WHISKEO
Dear SECRET, forgive the mean spiritedness of my previous post in this thread, however, the topic IS "meeeeeeeeeeean nut". If you wish to start a "nice, sensitive nut" post, I will gladly share tales of my kinder, gentler skeet shooting. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[imported_El Mamerro]

http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/diseases/hepatitis/b/images/adol-girls.jpg

"What's a grill?"

[dBUSH]

I met this girl at my friend's party, she looked alright and she was kinda nice- easy to talk to. We end up in my homey's backyard blazing up the clubhouse and we start messing around. The bopper loved to bop, so just like that, she had a mouthful of wang. She was a talented stranger and I was having a good ol' time. Thoughts of how dirty this girl could be started floating around my noggin' and I decided to let my climax be a secret surprise. I'm no good at keeping a secret and the slightest "oh shit" gave me away. This girl grabs my hips and does doubletime- OH SHIT! I never knew a girl to swallow and this girl apparently thrived offa jizm cause from my angle she looked like a circus seal on life support. With that mental image I did not fuck her thank god.

oh shit mamerro thats fucked up!:beat:

[teister]

I only came from getting head once. It takes me mad long that way. Shit was like dripping out of her mouth and she was trying to catch it in her hands. She goes, "I didn't get it all." and ran to the bathroom to clean up her face. Then she came back and played with it till it got hard again and then sat on it to get hers. Another time with a different girl, she was too sore from the night before so I sat on her stomach and she jerked me off and I shot all over the place. Only a little got on her face though.

[REGULATOR]

u guys are fuckin lucky...id kill to get head

[Fox Mulder]

this really deserves a bump.

[imported_DEADONE]

she was like and i was like and then she spit some gizzzzz all over this fly ass tshirt i had on, it was new to!




hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha ha :heated: :huh?:

[got tha feva]

Now for the real question: how many of you guys have tasted your own nut out of curiosity?


prude

[imported_dr. frink one]

hmm...me? I really don't enjoy when a girl spits. Would I eat your pussy and then go spit cause your shit tastes bad?...thats just not nice. Most girls who have given me head just swallow and don't complain. One aimed the shit at me and made me take my fuckin shirt to the cleaners....and one was down for the whole facial bonanza....heh
I like the gurgle stories,
or the ones involving the 12oz faces...hehe...
on the grill? Frink says :)

oh...and I have never tasted my on jizz...i think its cause i know where its been

[T.T Boy]

now why would i want to taste my own semen? im comfortable with tasting the vagina fluid and thats all i plan on tasting.

[pinchecabron]

Originally posted by suburbian bum
One time i busted in my own eye, no joke.
that shit is mad funny.........

[bug]

Try this: cut dairy (cheese, milk etc) out of your diet, eat lots of cinnamon with your cereal in the morning. your girl will like the taste of your cum. worked for me for a while. she swallowed all the time. i aint getting head lately so i started eating pizza again. i like pizza.

[dBUSH]

nope- never tasted my jizz- one time this girl told me that mine tasted good- I said it's cause I drink a lot of juice. What about kissing you girl (assuming it is you girl) after you bust? First I have to inspect her mouth to make sure she isn't planning a snowball fight- then afterwards I have to call her 'dicklips.'

[imported_theFUME]

bitches must brush after head before i kiss them

yuck


never

[dBUSH]

well for some strange reason I think it's really hot when a chick wants to kiss me after I've been eating her out- I don't wanna taste my wang but I'm not trying to be unfair. :D

[imported_bobobi11]

This thread made me laugh. I don't care for it, but will let my honey if he really begs.

For those of you who haven't tasted your own, you need to taste it before you whine too much about a girl not being interested. It ain't the same as pussy juice.

[Fox Mulder]

Originally posted by bobobi11
It ain't the same as pussy juice.

do you know this from experience?

[imported_bobobi11]

We are getting waaaayyy too personal here, but yes I have tasted my own juice. It's not the same.

[TOY]

Originally posted by bug
Try this: cut dairy (cheese, milk etc) out of your diet, eat lots of cinnamon with your cereal in the morning. your girl will like the taste of your cum. worked for me for a while. she swallowed all the time. i aint getting head lately so i started eating pizza again. i like pizza.
my friend's aunt-shes a slut- was telling us that if you eat avacadoes, it makes your nut taste good.

[swif1]

:lol: those last posts were madd funny...bIZZump...i almost came close to tasting my own semen while i was spanking my monkey.anyone ever do it 69 and then both yall came? [img]http://www.3rdshift.org/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_69.gif'>

i bet this happens a lot [img]http://www.3rdshift.org/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_bj.gif'>

...hehe...[img]http://www.3rdshift.org/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_monkey.gif'>

i like this one...[img]http://www.3rdshift.org/phpBB/images/smiles/icon_nanner.gif'>

[sumtina3DD]

fuk you guys are fukin funnee i swear i laff all the time at the shit you guys be sayin...but only to myself all quiet and shit cuz i gotta be all ladylike proper girl hard at work Thank You

soo i gotta cut this short my boy busted some glue (thats what i call it) on my face cuz he wanted to and i let him so he went all out got all smeary and fuk it got in my eyeball! so i run to the bathroom try to wash
it but damn that glues all sticky and you know how it gets when you mix it with water like greasy or takes on some sort of surfactant-like attitude
like "your not washing me off" ....im stupid
so my eye's all red and sort of cloudy to look out of and "what the hell are the sperm trying to impregnate the eyeball" i was scared it would'nt go away and i would have to explain to everyone what happened if they were to ask me cuz i suck at lying
kirk out

[BwareUfDogg!]

ok --I'm going out on a limb here because I'm a girl and all these replies have been dudes...Now I'm not really about sharing shit like this but the shit is funny....

So I'm giving dude head right.....and I'm just doin my thang I mean I know what the fuck is up with a cock in my mouth and this particular time my goal was for dude to bust in the shortest amount of time possible( it was just supposed to be a quickie) but see some dudes have a 'trigger finger' complex where they are so enjoying it they hold back their cum. FUCK I HATE THAT SHIT anyway I'm like fuckin dying cuz what should have been like a five minute thing was approaching being a 30 minute thing....now for you fools who don't understand all that goes into a B.J. after awhile a chik gets lock jaw, her lips go numb, eyes start watering, neck gets all tense you--- get to a point where you just want to bite it off! So anyway I'm just going still.. cuz I'll be damned if I'm gonna suck a dick and he doesn't bust, after all... I have a reputation to uphold.
So finally I come up and I'm about to say are you gonna bust or what and just as I moved my head back this huge fuckin load just shoots over my head and hear this "aaagh fuuuck" and I turn around and dudes roommates chik had just walked in
She had the baby batch sauce just all up in her hair, in her mouth, up her nose....that shit was cryin funny and damn she was mad. Her man was even madder because apparently he'd never gotten to drop on her face. HA!

[avils]

Aight so here's the dealy..

After reading this post the other day and relating my previous experiences, I had a strengthened resolve to do this shit right..

My girl asked me last week if she gave me a blow job would I take her to the movies.. I was like.. umm.. well.. FUCK YEAH! soo..

So she starts doin her thing and she even suggested I put on "Shut Up and Blow Me Vol 2" to help the mood. Well things were going great and I decided now was the time to set the record straight. I told her to lie back and I sat over her chest sorta thing. Then I started whacking away at myself like I was putting up a 40 storey office block and shorty was licking and sucking my fingers. So between watching her do that and checking the porno on TV, shit got reallll hectic. To cut it short, I told her I was gonna come so I moved up closer to her face and went for it. Wad # 1 col shot straight over her face, rebounded off her hair and landed on the pillow. Wad #2 almost did the same but with less velocity and homegirl copped most of it straight in the mouth.. #'s 3, 4 & 5 hit her chin and neck but she ended up with this maad trail of tonsil topping straight across her face from # 1 and 2. She actually started giggling and afterwards told me how much fun it was.... DAMN!!

So thanks Mero for putting the ideas back in my head..

UP !!

[imported_bobobi11]

Tease you got it buddy. This chick is pretty cool. I think that goes right up there with the ton 10 funniest posts.

Hey there though there are more of us girls than you think. I'll bump the female members thread for you.

Almost forgot...Way to go Avils

[avils]

Originally posted by bobobi11
Almost forgot...Way to go Avils

Hey thanks.. please dont take my other post the wrong way. Like I respect my girls and stuff and I wouldn't make em do it if they weren't down ya know ?

Arghhhh ^@#$ *splat... uhhhhhh BLAM !#* ka pow !# *splooge*... ZZzzzz sorry ladies..:crazy:

[swif1]

im prolly the only one here that hasnt gotten any head

[REGULATOR]

i havent gotten shit either...but im young so its not in my profile yet

[imported_splint2]

bewareufdogg...you kick ass...girls that can talk about that kind of stuff openly are awesome...

[imported_FROSTY]

Originally posted by BwareUfDogg!
ok --I'm going out on a limb here because I'm a girl and all these replies have been dudes...Now I'm not really about sharing shit like this but the shit is funny....

So I'm giving dude head right.....and I'm just doin my thang I mean I know what the fuck is up with a cock in my mouth and this particular time my goal was for dude to bust in the shortest amount of time possible( it was just supposed to be a quickie) but see some dudes have a 'trigger finger' complex where they are so enjoying it they hold back their cum. FUCK I HATE THAT SHIT anyway I'm like fuckin dying cuz what should have been like a five minute thing was approaching being a 30 minute thing....now for you fools who don't understand all that goes into a B.J. after awhile a chik gets lock jaw, her lips go numb, eyes start watering, neck gets all tense you--- get to a point where you just want to bite it off! So anyway I'm just going still.. cuz I'll be damned if I'm gonna suck a dick and he doesn't bust, after all... I have a reputation to uphold.
So finally I come up and I'm about to say are you gonna bust or what and just as I moved my head back this huge fuckin load just shoots over my head and hear this "aaagh fuuuck" and I turn around and dudes roommates chik had just walked in
She had the baby batch sauce just all up in her hair, in her mouth, up her nose....that shit was cryin funny and damn she was mad. Her man was even madder because apparently he'd never gotten to drop on her face. HA!



hahahahahahahahahahaa im laughin my ballsack offff!!!!

one day i wanna just bust a nut in a cup and poor it off the top floor of the mall or somethin hahaha......

[WebsterUno]

Originally posted by cmeup
CAN I GET A MUTHA FUCKING STANDING OVATION FOR THIS GIRL RIGHT HERE!!!!!!!!!!

Woot woot!
*Rasing the Roof*

[swif1]

About a year ago, an ex-girlfriend of mine was bobbin my knob in my room. I wanted to make it last so i was tryin to hold out for awhile, this didn't last too long. When i couldn't hold it any longer, I let it fly. She wasn't expecting it and and it hit her so fast that it came out of her nose. When she got up, it was all i could do not to die laughing in her face!!! That was first and only White Dragon experience, but it kicked~ass!!!

disclaimer: my friend typed this up...this happened to him not me

[graffsurgeon]

the walrus..persay.

[ASER1NE]

Originally posted by LAZYBONES
nope- never tasted my jizz- one time this girl told me that mine tasted good- I said it's cause I drink a lot of juice. What about kissing you girl (assuming it is you girl) after you bust? First I have to inspect her mouth to make sure she isn't planning a snowball fight- then afterwards I have to call her 'dicklips.'

hahaha that shit is furious funny

[ASER1NE]

Originally posted by cmeup


real close to it!!!

i was in pure bliss one time in tha tube, laying down getting my swerve on, and i seen tha biggest fucking ball of splooooooooge fly up, and i was all like :) mouth open and all, then i was like oh shit, and i pulled a matrix and moved out tha way right before it got in my mouth/eyes...

ahhaahahah scary shit im tellin you!

teaserok

and i can understand that girls might not like it, some guys got worse shit than others, but as for me, if i got a girl squirting her juices all over...(have yall seen a porn with them really bustin! looks like a water faucet bursted) i would be trying to catch all that shit in my mouth like it was cherry kool-aid, please believe :lol:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA THAT SHIT IS FUKKIN HILARIOUS TOO......:) :)

[ASER1NE]

women bitch about eating spunk , but chiks pussies arent fukkin pudding either.........so it has to go both ways , eye for an eye shit .......no pun intended

no way in hell i kiss my girl after that , eeeww fuk thats sikk........but kissin her after i eat her out is OKAY ........and i think all relationships got to be nasty in the bedroom...if you cant get freaky on ur girl then fuk .........move on....( unless she's stupid fly)

[shameless self promotion]

Originally posted by ASER1NE
unless she's stupid fly)

uuuuuh..eeeeerrrr....uuuuuuuugggghhhh....ya got any gum?

[imported_chizm]

BAAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

Originally posted by El Mamerro
[img]http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/diseases/hepatitis/b/images/adol-girls.jpg'>

"What's a grill?"

[swif1]

anyone save all their nut in this?
[img]http://www.artsupplies.com/images/Elmers_02.jpg'>
[img]http://www.artsupplies.com/images/Elmers_04.jpg'>

[WebsterUno]

[img]http://imagep.webphotos.iwon.com//1000020932/1000020932_111200230325PM0.9369165.jpg'>
Beep Beep


****just a test****

[swif1]

that looks dope

[sumtina3DD]

Originally posted by swif1
anyone save all their nut in this?
[img]http://www.artsupplies.com/images/Elmers_02.jpg'>
[img]http://www.artsupplies.com/images/Elmers_04.jpg'>

ahaha GLUE STORAGE!
but i'll take it fresh fom the GUN itself!

[swif1]

micrwave that shit so it will feel like it just came out :D

[trAmple]

i met this chick and i parked my car, i fingered her and made her cum so she decides to give me head..as i climax and spit in her mouth she continues swallowing and sucking one of the best nute i ever had she sucked till i was dry damn it was heavenly

[cooterman]

jeez u got now idea how mean that nut was that ibusted

[~i~hear~voices~]

[img]http://www.rebelcutie.com/photos/af6b/livlawless137.jpg'>

mah bitch loves it when i give her facials..:D

[evoloner]

the craziest experience I had ( and I still pull this one on the regular) as your girl is sucking and your about to drop your load, pull her head into you not hard but so she gags on you shit. the cum with come flying out her nose. funniest fucking thing you will ever see. but be cautious this is extremely dangerous if you dont know what your doing because if you wait to long she'll bite down on your tool. has not happened but came close

[willy.wonka]

i try not to..im down with kissing a girl who just sucked me off.
i drink a cup of my own shit everyday..
i remember saying a long time a go...
its like a shooting game...you can aim that thing anywhere..and with good power,you can shoot that shit clear across the room..personally i like to shoot at the girls asshole...its good fun..i think they like it too:idea:

[dukeofyork]

shits funny...


of course sex in itself has become pretty entertaining..



i almost ask, why is this girl even letting me do this?
i hope she gets something out of it..
:D





oh, and BUMP!!

[chicken bone]

We were having sex without a condom and she wanted me to cum on her breasts so I pull out and a huge shot like bounces off of her left tit and gets on her ear, in her hair, on her cheek, and all over the wall.

We both started laughing. And then I had to kill her.

[the shitz]

shit whend 12oz get so funny again haha im laughin my ass off

[uncle-boy]

Originally posted by willy.wonka
i try not to..im down with kissing a girl who just sucked me off.
i drink a cup of my own shit everyday..
i remember saying a long time a go...
its like a shooting game...you can aim that thing anywhere..and with good power,you can shoot that shit clear across the room..personally i like to shoot at the girls asshole...its good fun..i think they like it too:idea:

:lol: :lol:

blahahahahahahahahaahh!!!!!!!!

[-MOE LESTER-]

Originally posted by chicken bone
We were having sex without a condom and she wanted me to cum on her breasts so I pull out and a huge shot like bounces off of her left tit and gets on her ear, in her hair, on her cheek, and all over the wall.

We both started laughing. And then I had to kill her.

HOW THE FUCK DOES JIZZ BOUNCE?!??!?!

[chicken bone]

My old girlfriend used to have a sort of fetish for swallowing nut (well not really a fetish, but I mean she LOVED eating my nut) and so whenever we fucked I would pull it out pornstar style and unleash the havoc into her mouth.

Well since she liked it so much and I tended to cum a lot, she would try to like swallow it all before the next shot came, just so she could eat it all. This unfortunatly lead to her choking, coughing and sputtering while the rest of the nut went all over the place (usually in her hair or on her neck or something), all while I was laughing my ass off...

This happened like EVERYTIME we had sex.

[swif1]

your girlfriend is rushin.' haha

moe lester: if your load flies quick enough...

[yoshy]

Originally posted by -MOE LESTER-


HOW THE FUCK DOES JIZZ BOUNCE?!??!?!

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by chicken bone
We were having sex without a condom and she wanted me to cum on her breasts so I pull out and a huge shot like bounces off of her left tit and gets on her ear, in her hair, on her cheek, and all over the wall.

We both started laughing. And then I had to kill her.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



BUMP

[krie]

ill bust one in your grill if u aint careful..

[Al Green]

the comments btwn whiskeo and secret on the first page are funny.

[keep]

like the 2nd or 3rd time i ever had sex i managed to shoot one off into her eye, she freaked out. "ITS IN MY EYE!!" she was all screaming and freaking out, i couldnt stop laughing. the funniest part was she had to get dressed and walk by my parents in the living room to go to the bathroom. when ever i see her i still hear that in my mind "ITS IN MY EYE!@"

[xwibxonex]

my girl loves to give head, she told me she doesn't like the taste, but said shed swallow on the honeymoon, hahah
one day she was going at it hard, and i decided, damn, im gonna keep it quiet and surprise her, i blow it right in her mouth, right as im about to get up and act all surprised she hocks a deep ass loogie and launches it right on my stomach, looks, winks smiles and goes to sink to wash up, hilarious moment

[crave]

Originally posted by Al Green
the comments btwn whiskeo and secret on the first page are funny.
sensitive skeet shooting..

[Dick Quickwood]

i started reading this shit and by the time i got to page 2 i had enough

[Nutonce]

mouth only. fools.

[The_Bench]

Back in highschool, I went to a kegger and got hella loaded. Anyway, this one chick who had a thing for me, but I didn't like, started hitting on me. She asked me if I wanted her to give me head, letting the beer take the unattractive edge off her, I went into the bathroom with her and started getting skull. When I finished my beer, I had had about enough so yanked it out and blew all over her forehead and hair. She started going off and freaking out on me. Then she TOOK OFF her wig and started washing the manjuice out. The guy who's house it was came in cuz he thought some chick was getting raped with all the yelling going on. We both had a good laugh. Seeing her that monday at school was so sweet... I think I ruined that wig of hers cuz it was fucked up after that and she won't even look at me in the halls. I felt kinda bad cuz she had cancer or somethin Got the nick name Wiggy from that little episode.

[test pattern]

MAUHAUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH :lol:

[caL]

no but, maybe i shouldve put that on my things to do list on that other thread :D

[hold the cup]

willy.wonka is a strange one

[NOUM]

Originally posted by hold the cup
willy.wonka is a strange one i heard he has a hook for a hand..

[the JEL kid]

LOL WHY WOULD U EVEN BUST ON YA GIRL FOR , BY THE END OF THE DAY U WON'T BE ABLE TO LOOK AT HER FACE LOL U BE LIKE THATS A NASTY BITCH

[One_in_Ten]

Originally posted by -MOE LESTER-


HOW THE FUCK DOES JIZZ BOUNCE?!??!?!

listen soon your body will go through some changes.
youll start getting hair in places it wasnt before.
soon after that you will start to have New feelings.
at this point you will be prime to play the skin flute.
Soon after some practice you can take the show an the road. And you too will be bouncing jizz with the best of them...

[crave]

^^:lol:

its all about taking the show on the road. good advice.

[Parted Ways]

HAHAHAHAHA

[NOUM]

Originally posted by Scott LaJock
listen soon your body will go through some changes.
youll start getting hair in places it wasnt before.
soon after that you will start to have New feelings.
at this point you will be prime to play the skin flute.
Soon after some practice you can take the show an the road. And you too will be bouncing jizz with the best of them... :lol:

[Towley]

My friend told me about this once but I havent hated a bitch enough to try it.

After bangin that ho in the ass, make a bunch of sounds like your done.
Spit on her back to give it the full effect. After she turns around...... Bam Right in the grill..............Never Failez

[dork]

[img]http://www.yumfactory.com/neweyecandy/gloop.jpg'>

[test pattern]

help me dr. puberty... what's happening to my skin?
my face is full of blotches from my forehead to my chin

don't worry brenda, what you suffer from is zits
guys will never notice because they're busy staring at your tits

i remember it was last night i was feeling kind of naughty
i was having just a little bit too much fun with my body
i was chillin' watching tv, i stumbled on baywatch
i got a strange sensation like a fever in my crotch!!!

[crave]

those newer blowjob threads made me think of this one. i needed a laugh anyways.. .

[the_gooch]

i was screwing around with this married chick from my old job a few years back. she came over my apt. one time and we boned, i remeber when i pulled out i shot right up to her eye, pretty decent amount at that....for some reason i put my arms up and cheered, then laughed. i still dont know why. she laughed too but i think she thought i was a weirdo or a dick......haha

[imported_Europe]

This thread is a classic... Keeps bouncing back like... well like sperm.

[BADMUTHAFUKA]

"Once i see the semen, I'm leavin'"

-Cristopher Wallace A.K.A Biggie Smalls

:idea:

[!@#$%]

meeeeeemorieeeesssss
in the corners of the 12oz....



misty cum colored memorieeeeessss


of the way we talked shiiiiiiitt

[InnerCityRebel]

This thread is classic...

I was tittie fucking my ex one time and then bam i had to cum.I end up trying to nut on her chest but instead i fire a cum rocket which hits her neck and shots straight up into the air.I swear if i didn't pull my head back it would have nailed me in the face.It actually ended up hitting her ear.I was laughing for days about that shit.

[MEROJUANA]

IM LIKE THE NAS OF 12.OZ B, MY THREADS ARE CLASSICS. A MOD SHOULD PUT THEM ALL TOGETHER AND MAKE A "BEST OF MERO" COMPILATION.





MEROESS
ILLMATIC

[getNice]

such things are the only fun left in life.

[TURBOCAPSLOK]

ONE OF MY EX GIRLFRIENDS USED TO ASK ME TO NUT ON HER FACE..
BUT MY CURRENT ONE? NAH, SHE'S A SWALLOWER BUT NOT A FACIAL GIRL

[Neskoner]

I dont smoke blunts unless they rolled proper.
I dont fuck wit dames unless they gonna swoller.

[duh-rye-won]

fuckin mero.

:lol:

[dpuerto]

I love pulling out cuz i have some excellent range and can shoot from the pussy to the face. Problem with that is there is no aim so it can end up in arm pit, hair, eyes, bed, etc. Oh well.

funny shit.

[Relek]

damn this thread is funny. i'd contribute but i don't have any funny stories. i've had 1 spitter, 3 swallower's, and 2 that just couldn't go the distance.

[Boring Bastard]

Originally posted by The_Bench
Back in highschool, I went to a kegger and got hella loaded. Anyway, this one chick who had a thing for me, but I didn't like, started hitting on me. She asked me if I wanted her to give me head, letting the beer take the unattractive edge off her, I went into the bathroom with her and started getting skull. When I finished my beer, I had had about enough so yanked it out and blew all over her forehead and hair. She started going off and freaking out on me. Then she TOOK OFF her wig and started washing the manjuice out. The guy who's house it was came in cuz he thought some chick was getting raped with all the yelling going on. We both had a good laugh. Seeing her that monday at school was so sweet... I think I ruined that wig of hers cuz it was fucked up after that and she won't even look at me in the halls. I felt kinda bad cuz she had cancer or somethin Got the nick name Wiggy from that little episode.

Kid, you're foul! You got brains from a girl who had a wig on and cancer?
Then busted on her face? You're fucking fucked! And have no standards!

[Swiffer Jet]

Originally posted by MEROJUANA
IM LIKE THE NAS OF 12.OZ B, MY THREADS ARE CLASSICS. A MOD SHOULD PUT THEM ALL TOGETHER AND MAKE A "BEST OF MERO" COMPILATION.





MEROESS
ILLMATIC

HAHA! this thread is quite amusing. Oh the memories.

[imported_dowmagik]

i almost always bust all over my girl, otherwise that shit gets all over my bed sheets and im just not down. i dont bust i n her face often though, because it usually ends up in her eyes, which she says hurts a lot. last time i got some cum in her eye we had to visit her mom at work and was asked if she had pink eye.

[TEE_rase_war]

it's great when you can pawn it off as an acident.

"oh shit, is that where it got you"

or if you are so lucky to have a chick that enjoy's it. then hats off to her~