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bitches is crazy

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by dowmagik, Jan 27, 2010.

  1. dowmagik

    dowmagik 12oz Veteran Member

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    bitches is crazy

    Discussion started by dowmagik - Jan 27, 2010

    today is the 2 yr anniversary of me and my wife's marriage (?). last july we split up.

    so i decided i would celebrate by going to the bar and getting DAF (drunk as fuck) all by myself. its a weekday, so the bar is incredibly slow.

    so im chillin, sippin jameson (on some jimmy mcnulty shit, please believe) when this gorgeous broad walks in the speakeasy. she is sittin on the other side of the bar, but i keep an open ear. turns out she works at bandon dunes, which is one of the best golf courses in the fuckin states. if you know me, you know i love golf. fuck. so i end up chatting it up with her. apparently she is at the bar because she just found out her husband is fucking another woman...


    GOLDEN

    she mentions something about how she really likes "titty bars"...

    "oh really? my ace is the bouncer at the ******** ***, lets go there, you deserve some good times...."

    ----

    so this crazy druk bitch drivs me to the spot, and i talk her into getting buck naked on stage and spreading her guts for me. terrific guts. shaved slit, nice rack, and an awesome body.

    after her dance, she collectes her money and we go outside to have a cigarette. everything is going rad until a big fight breaks out and the cops come. big downer.

    we leave the bar, and at a stoplight i tell her,

    "pull over somewhere so i can fuck you in the backseat of this jeep, you got me riled up"

    she looks at me and says "im not a slut, sorry"


    WTF??!?!?

    BITCH i just talked you into spreading your cunt in front of a long shoreman, your huband dont give a fuck about you, and im handsome as fuck.

    god damnit.

    this story sucks, BUT..



    bitches is crazy
     
    dowmagik - Rank: 12oz Veteran Member - Messages:
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  2. twinky the kid

    twinky the kid 12oz Veteran Member

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    twinky the kid - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    im in the same boat right now too dude, not necessarily the same circumstances but all the same bummed and blue balled.

    spankwire here i come.

    also, propped.
     
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  3. Poesia [ ] T

    Poesia [ ] T 12oz Veteran Member

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    Poesia [ ] T - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    [​IMG]
     
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  4. TheoHuxtable..

    TheoHuxtable.. 12oz Legend

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    TheoHuxtable.. - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    [​IMG]
     
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  5. Bad Medicine

    Bad Medicine 12oz Senior Member

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    Bad Medicine - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    [​IMG]
     
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  6. El Mamerro

    El Mamerro Dirty Dozen Crew

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    El Mamerro - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    [​IMG]
     
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  7. Miley Cyrus

    Miley Cyrus 12oz Senior Member

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    Miley Cyrus - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    10 bucks says this never happened.
     
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  8. Miley Cyrus

    Miley Cyrus 12oz Senior Member

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    Miley Cyrus - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    20 bucks says your not even that handsome.
     
    Feed Yer Ego likes this.
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  9. Fist 666

    Fist 666 Moderator Crew

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    Fist 666 - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    oh, he's that handsome. nh

    i believe you dow. the fuck does miley know, she's like 13.
     
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  10. TheoHuxtable..

    TheoHuxtable.. 12oz Legend

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    TheoHuxtable.. - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    [​IMG]
     
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  11. Tails0nE

    Tails0nE 12oz Elite Member

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    Tails0nE - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    you just got treated homie...
    :lol:
     
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  12. Swindle

    Swindle 12oz Loyalist

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    Swindle - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    damn that sucks
     
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  13. ShortFuse

    ShortFuse 12oz Elite Member

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    ShortFuse - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    If she was drivn you around then why the fuck you going to get it in the car...what about her takn you home, well to your place I mean?

    You got used bad and she thought it was worth the spread. Some bitches are like that even into the drunken stages of the night.

    It was the 12th anniversary of this brewery near me and they always throw a huge bash. So me and my boy back from the military are getting DAF as usual when he visits. A lot of awesome shit happened that night but what Im getting to is this chick I met dancing. Some foriegn chick named olga or something. Petite and proportioned...my favorite. So after we dance for a bit brewery starts closn. She diggn me so Im thinkn its going to go down later. Were talkn and I walk her home since she lives near the place. We get to talking on her couch and she mentions shes a musician...word...THEN she pops up and whips out this violin and starts playing it for me. Its 3am and Im more than becoming impatient. She pulls this Im 32 and your 21 (at the time) ....I didnt care. She starts beating around the bush so I said I gotta call a friend..I called a cab instead and pieced out whilst it was storming down rain and she wanted to chat MORE!! bleh


    :edit: Admitably so I didnt have a condom at the time...so I guess IM glad it didnt happen looking back on it.
     
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  14. Miley Cyrus

    Miley Cyrus 12oz Senior Member

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    Miley Cyrus - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    im 13 and a half assholes.
     
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  15. Swindle

    Swindle 12oz Loyalist

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    Swindle - Replied Jan 27, 2010

    smash^
     
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